Want to Feel Rich? Track Your Abundance

Want to Feel Rich? Track Your AbundanceDo you ever feel like you’re constantly being nickeled and dimed? Another bill or an unexpected expense can really leave you feeling like you’re dwindling down to your last penny. Not much fun to sit in that state, right?

Maybe money IS kind of hard to come by right now. You could be between jobs or considering leaving a job. Maybe you’ve had medical expenses that have left you feeling like your finances are a little tight.

Isn’t it strange that when finances feel strained, everything else starts to feel stressful, too?

That’s why when my friend told me about a process that helps you to see how much you’ve earned, saved and the value that’s existing in your world, I thought it was a great way to really take stock in how much you REALLY have in your life.

It helps you to see and feel the abundance that surrounds you but that you might be missing.

It lets you track how much you have in a totally new way that you’ve probably never considered.

This process for tracking your abundance really supports the quote I shared last week: “Abundance is not something we acquire. It is something we tune into.” by Wayne Dyer.

This handy tracking process makes it possible to tune into your abundance which allows you to feel confident in your decision making, un-stressed when things don’t go as you planned and more like life is going the way you want.

It was created by Denise Duffield-Thomas. I’m not an affiliate of hers but I love her idea for this so much that I had to share it with you. Especially if it helps you to feel a little more abundant in life.

The Idea Behind It

You track the pennies you found on the ground, the dinner someone prepared for you, the coupon you used at the store, the change you found in the sofa cushions, the $10 your friend handed you to help cover gas costs, the kind person driving in front of you who paid your bridge toll and all kinds of other kismet kindness that comes your way.

A cool part of this is that not only are you counting money, you’re also counting anything that has value to it like maybe you bought something that turned out to be an unexpected two for one deal.

How To Track Your Abundance

Grab your phone or a notepad and every day for a week write down all the money and value that comes your way. Yes, this includes your paycheck, birthday gifts, and change found in your coat pocket that you haven’t worn in a while.

If you want, Denise Duffield-Thomas has a PDF, a Google doc and an iPhone app that you can download to make it easier.

Check out her process for tracking abundance and let me know what you think about the idea in the comments. And, if you want to download one of her tracking devices, there’s a link to them at the end of that article.

Here’s to your tracking all the things that you see and can count as abundance coming your way!

With much love and gratitude,

Gretchen

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Need a Change of Attitude?

Need a Change of Attitude?Have you ever hung out with a family member or friend who always seems like a total downer because after the thousandth interaction with them you notice that they only complain or have a negative approach with everything they say.

They embody the phrase, “If you give them a rose, they’ll complain about the thorns”.

This attitude can spread to you and before you know it, you’re in the same negative mindset and talking in the same dreary, negative way. Uggh!

Or, maybe you’re the person complaining about the thorn in that lovely bouquet of roses! What?? We’ve all been there and it’s not easy to catch yourself when that happens, right?

It’s so frustrating when you realize this is going on and, there’s also a way to right the ship when it happens. Quite frankly, a way to avoid it all together.

What if you could help get your negative-nelly friend or co-worker out of that awful attitude, too? It’s totally possible.

Like an editor makes a book sound better, you can also wield your own “red pen” to re-shape the words you use to describe your situation. This means you can reset your attitude and usually avoid getting there from the start.

The Key?

Edit your words.

Words work as symbols and influence your way of thinking. This means you can create your own reality. Good or bad. Why not go after shaping a positive reality for yourself?

My children are one way that has helped to change the way my words shape my day and it’s this same editing process that can help you, too.

You reposition your phrases to be positive and about what you want. For example, “Aiden, the fork is for putting the spaghetti into your mouth.” vs. “Aiden, don’t dig the fork into the table.”

See how the first sentence sounds more positive than the second one? You can do this with your own words to amazing effect. It can change your attitude for the better no matter the situation at hand.

Once you get into the practice of it, it becomes a habit. Your good outlook on the world will show and spread to those around you. You’ll be and come across to others as a calm, cool and collected person in control of their world. Folks will want to be around you more.

At the end of a day, you’ll feel better about all of the good you’ve accomplished instead of focusing too much on the negative stuff that happened. You’ll be able to shake off the yucky parts of your day more easily.  

Okay, now try it for yourself. The next time you find yourself saying “I can’t do XYZ”, try to rephrase it so it’s positioned in a more positive light. For example, you might find yourself saying, “I can’t do that because I don’t have enough time/money/space.”

You could rephrase it to say something along the lines of, “I can do that if I want to re-arrange my schedule to make time for it next week.” Or, I can buy the organic produce if I’m better at planning my meals so I don’t eat out as much. Or, “I can work on that project in my backyard when it’s sunny so I don’t need a bigger space inside to do it.”

Once you’ve tried re-phrasing your words to be more positive, let me know in the comments if you felt a difference in your outlook when you changed your words to support a more positive attitude. I think you might be surprised when you try this.

With much love and gratitude,

Gretchen

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People May Hear Your Words, But They Feel Your Attitude

Maybe this quote should say “People and horses might hear your words but they feel your attitude.” In the case of doing a coaching session with a horse as the co-facilitator, like I’m doing now with Equus Coaching, this is completely the case.

In fact, this is how Equus Coaching works. The horse can feel or read your attitude and if it matches what you’re saying. This interaction with the horse keeps you honest and congruent.

If your words match your attitude and what you really feel, the horse will want to come closer to you. If it doesn’t, it’s your opportunity to dig deeper and figure out what else needs to be addressed so your actions match your words.

This straight-forward process sounds simple and it is, but it’s also the kind of experience that leaves you feeling like you just had a major breakthrough with something that was holding you back. Or that you finally understand why you did something that didn’t work out. It’s amazing to see in action.

Equus Coaching is a way to for us humans to understand how others are really perceiving us and feeling our attitude. I really strive to find the positive in any negative situation, especially if it’s something I can’t change. So, like with a horse-based coaching session, if you’re showing an angry and upset attitude, people won’t be able to listen to you. Learning firsthand how this works is so helpful to getting ahead.

As I’ve been doing Equus Coaching sessions, I’ve seen attitudes lift and ah-ha moments happen. People end the session walking a little taller, more confident and excited to get back to their life with this new understanding of themselves. It’s been amazing to see it happen.

The next time you’re in a public setting, notice when someone’s words aren’t matching their attitude. Maybe it’s a grumpy greeter at a restaurant or an overworked barista whose words are pleasant, but you can tell they don’t match how they feel.

Let me know in the comments if you’ve noticed this before. How did it compel or repel you towards or from that person?

With much love and gratitude,

Gretchen

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5 Ways to Create a Positive Attitude

5 Ways To Creat a Positive AttitudeWithout a positive attitude, it’s nearly impossible to grow and be able to do all of the things that you enjoy most.

When you’re feeling stuck in a less-than-helpful attitude, it can be hard to figure out what you’re really good at doing and stop you from really going after it.

Seeing how a positive attitude works in my life and with my clients, has shown me that it’s truly worth it to find ways to create a positive attitude. By making a good attitude a habit, you can keep reaching and achieving the big things you want out of life instead of stagnating and feeling stuck with what you have even though you know you could be and do more in this world.

When, just like with horses, 60% to 90% of your communication is nonverbal, the way you hold yourself not only shows others your attitude but yourself, too.

If you find yourself sitting with your shoulders up to your ears, squinting at the computer screen with what some might call a scowl on your face, you’ve just observed that you might not be in the best mindset.

Here are 5 things you can do to help get your attitude headed in a positive direction.

1. Own It – You Can Change Your Mind

Remind yourself that own your attitude which means you can change it. There is always a choice that you make when your respond to something. By this I mean that you get to pick which perspective you want to take on a topic.

It’s easy to forget that there are options. Next time you find yourself reacting in a way that makes you unhappy, pretend you’re that super optimistic friend of yours. What would they say in that situation? How would they respond?

2. Know It’s Temporary

Realize that a bad mood will pass. A bad project will pass. A bad conversation will pass.

Sometimes just knowing that your attitude will improve soon as things change over a short period of time allows you to hang on and keep a sliver of positivity when otherwise you might jump into despair. Much like having a bad head cold, a negative attitude sometimes needs to be waited-out.

If you can remember while you’re in the middle of it that it’ll eventually subside, grab ideas 3, 4 and 5 below to help pull you out of it faster.

3. Smile

Because it’s proven to make you happier. Yep, all of the things you physically do change the chemicals in your body and how you feel about yourself.

So smile, put your hands behind your head and feet up on your desk, or strike a “Wonder Woman” hands-on-hips power-pose to get your can-do attitude on the rise.

Hold that position for 2 minutes and you’ll have released chemicals in your body that get you feeling better about yourself and ready to take on your next thing. Professor Amy Cuddy’s Harvard research proves that these kinds of actions literally change the way you’re perceived by others and the way you feel about yourself.

4. Have 3 “Go-To Things”

What are three things that you’ve observed in the past that help get you to a more positive mood?

Does turning music on (and news off) help? Do you have a comedian that you love to watch? Go find some clips of them and get laughing.

I have a video of my daughter that cracks me up everytime I watch it. If you have a video like that, make sure you know where to find it the next time you need a little lift for a more positive attitude.

If you don’t have a child, here’s a video compilation of someone else’s who is pretty darn funny.

5. Complaint Department is Closed

Tell your family, friends and co-workers that the complaint department is closed for the day. If someone comes to you with a complaint, have a neutral response prepared. What can you think of now to say when this happens that will table the conversation until you feel ready to deal with it?

Maybe you ask them to find one or two ways to resolve whatever the problem is before they do a deep-dive venting session with you. Then tell them that you’ll be happy to talk about the issue after lunch, or tomorrow, whenever it’s more convenient for you to speak about it.

The goal here is to buy you time so you can get in a better frame of mind before you deal with an issue that might really pull you away from a positive attitude and the energy that you need to finish your project at hand.

What’s one thing that you do that helps to get you into a positive mood? Share it in the comments box so I can give it a try.

With much love and gratitude,

Gretchen

 

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Thoughts Become Things

Thoughts Become ThingsI don’t know where I originally heard this quote, “Thoughts become things” but it’s always stuck with me. And, I know it’s true.

I always try to focus on positive results since I’ve seen how it affects me in a negative way when I don’t. AND, because I’ve seen firsthand how it impacts me for the better when I maintain a positive mindset.

For example, this farm I live on wouldn’t have been possible if I hadn’t gotten on board with my husband’s proactive and positive thinking about it. He’s quite the visionary and big picture thinker. 😉

It was a big leap for us to try to buy the farm. Eight years ago, we didn’t know if we’d get approved loan-wise. Afterall, it was a huge investment and we currently already had a mortgage. And because we kept our thoughts focused in the right direction, our loan was approved and this place became our reality despite it not seeming logical or possible for that matter.

We’ve now got a modern barn, new Equus Coaching office, two horses, chickens, dogs and fields of produce on our dream property that has that beautiful tree-lined pond you see in the image (yes, that’s really my farm!).

I encourage you to hold this quote with you and have your thoughts say yes to some of the things you’ve been wanting. It allows for more, so many more possibilities to become real. Many that you wouldn’t even know are possible.

Let me know in the comments what thoughts of yours have become things.

With much love and gratitude,

Gretchen

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You’ve Always Had the Power My Dear

You've always had the power my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself. -Wizard of OzI’ll admit, I wasn’t sure if I was qualified to do the Equus training program because I wasn’t sure if I could be a coach. However, I decided to take the plunge and as I went through the training, I realized I did have the courage to actually do it.

I’ve always had the willingness to say yes and do big things but I lacked the confidence. I went through the Equus Coach Training and I realized I had the confidence and power to do it all along.

Where have you felt this in your life?

With much love and gratitude,

Gretchen

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Stuck in Overwhelm? 3 Ways You Can Get Out of It

Stuck in Overwhelm? 3 Ways You Can Get Out of It When do you begin to notice you’re swamped with too much to do and that stress is starting to creep in?? Is it when you’ve nearly bitten the head off of a co-worker or family member (oops!)?

Or when you’re so dog-tired that you’re starting to make careless mistakes because you’ve been staring at the computer screen for what feels like a thousand hours? Around here we like to call that a case of having “mush brain”.

If this is the case, it may be too late to prevent the overwhelm feeling from setting in because you’ve just found yourself in the thick of feeling stressed out with too much on your plate, and too many deadlines to meet.

It can sneak up on you just like that. Fine one minute and then boom!, hello overwhelm-ville.

Last week we talked about taking turtle steps so you can see your progress as a way to get out of feeling overwhelmed by your to-do list.

This week we’re taking it a step further by giving you three totally different ways to cope with the stress of feeling like there’s too much on your plate.

Here are three techniques in different sizes that allow you to get a little separation from the project at hand that’s causing you pain.

SMALL:

You’re stuck at your desk and you’re about to lose it because you just realized that you forgot you needed to do that other part of the project, the one that essentially eats up any float time you might have had.

When this happens, take several deep breaths and feel your feet on the ground. Take note of your five senses. What do you smell? What do you hear? What do you taste? What do you see? What do you feel?

This will allow for you to come back to the present moment, feel grounded + centered and allow for you to think more clearly when deciding that next step.

MEDIUM:

Get up and take a break away from your project. This could be that you go get a glass of water, take a restroom break, go into a conference room and call a friend for a few minutes, surf social media, walk to the mailbox, or get out of the office by going to pick up lunch.

The key here is to physically get away from the project. And to spend a little more time doing something else than in the breathing exercise. This will give you a longer break from the overwhelm zone.

LARGE:

Go exercise. This could be as simple as walking around the block. Or it could be that at some point during the day, you go for a run, bike ride, horseback ride, head to the gym to workout, or take an exercise class.

This will really get you out of your head (and worries) and into your body and, in the present moment. It’s hard to stress out about all the stuff you’ve got to get done, let alone think about anything else but your body’s movements, when your boot camp coach is encouraging you to ride that stationary bike faster or do yet another squat.

The next time you find yourself all of a sudden feeling the pressure to get it all done pronto, pick just one of these techniques and notice how it helps you. The more you do it, the more you can train your mind to accept the break which will make it easier to get back to work, feeling like you can get it all done, no problem.

With much love and gratitude,

Gretchen

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How Do Other People See You?

How Do Other People See You?Do others see you differently than you see yourself?

Do they think you’re smart, organized, or successful? Are you likeable?

Or maybe they think you’re lazy, over confident or a complainer?

We’ve all got stories in our minds of how *we think* other people or the “everybody’s” perceive us. But in reality, those stories are a giant blind spot and we aren’t all that sure how we’re viewed.

Since we’re all inside our own minds and bodies, it’s hard to get a full, 360 degree view of ourselves. Sometimes this blind spot presents itself as a mysterious disconnect. “Why did they act that way towards me?? Or “How come I didn’t get that job?”

Sometimes the blind spot results in lack of trust in yourself or is the basis for patterns in your life that you hate to see pop up again and again.

What if you could know how others see you?

Body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice all play a part. They tell people right away how much they can trust us and how authentic we are.

Sometimes we carry ourselves and express ourselves in ways that we don’t even realize. From simple things such as how a person might not stand up straight all the time or how someone else might, out of habit, always ask questions that they already have the answer to. Both of these are things those people don’t know they’re doing and if they knew how it was shaping the way others see them and their potential, they might decide to adjust how they show up in that area.

So the question is, how do you figure this out? Do you survey your family and friends? Your co-workers (gah!)? Maybe take an online personality test but can you really trust that?

There’s an easier way and if you’ve been following my work for a while, you’ll be able to guess that yes, it involves horses.

Stepping into a round pen with a horse is one of the fastest ways to learn what’s hidden in your personal blindspot. It’s far better than surveying your friends or taking an online quiz because a horse never judges you and more importantly, it never lies. The horse will always mirror back to you how you are feeling internally while all being done nonverbally.

Most every time a client is in the round pen experiencing the Equus coaching process, they have an ‘ah-ha!’ moment.

This experience, without ever getting on a horse, amps up their confidence because of what they’ve learned from those ah-ha moments. These discoveries put those disquieting, I-know-things-could-be-better worries at bay.

They finally give them a glimpse into how others see and react to them every day. They’re able to understand patterns and behaviors that aren’t serving their needs. And, they’re able to take action to change them immediately.

One example is if a person has issues with boundaries. This helps them put themselves first, and finally create a life that they want instead of playing small, only pleasing others and never reaching their full potential.

It means having solid confidence, feeling empowered and taking charge of life.

Through the horse’s’ ability to validate actions, blind spots are reflected back to help each person see a better path to reaching their goals. Being able to see how others perceive them means they can change unhelpful habits to create and enjoy the life they’ve always wanted.

Have you ever worried how other people see you and how it might be shaping your life? Or do you feel like you have habits that are hard to put your finger on that are getting in your way? Let me know in the comments. I’d love to hear how this shows up for you.

With much love and gratitude,

Gretchen

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Those Wise Words You Write While Day Dreaming

Those Wise Words You Write While Day DreamingWhile at the Equus training ranch in California for my second in-person training workshop, I created this doodle of words, well it’s more of a list, that resonated with me. I got to be there with my herd mates, all people who are also training to be certified in the Equus Coaching process.

During the training, while I was observing another herd mate who was in the round pen with a horse being coached, I was reflecting on what I was learning and honestly, what we we’re all learning. This doodle list is what came to me in a very profound way.

I could tell that I had learned a lot because I was able to really, keenly observe that not only had I learned in these areas, but I could feel the feels in these areas. I also found that many of the same themes came up for the other coaches-in-training. It got me thinking that maybe these are also areas that might come up for you.

Those Wise Words Your Write While Day DreamingA big part of training is to not only learn the Equus coaching process but to also participate and be coached using the tools that are given. It’s amazing to learn a craft through the very tools and techniques of that craft. In the software industry, this is called eating your own dog food but everywhere else, it’s more commonly known as practicing what your preach. 🙂

Months later these words still resonate for me since it was September when I created this doodle. It’s a constant practice to observe when I feel these feels and it’s been a very valuable one. These words and themes keep me on track and feeling balanced.

The words in parentheses are what each of the main words mean to me personally. They are all words I use often and I went deeper within myself to define what those mean and feel like to me.

It’s a great reminder of what to reflect on and believe in.

Do any of these words or themes resonate with you? Do you have your own words that you come back to time and time again?

I invite you to share 1-2 words or themes that have come up for you and how you personally define or add meaning to them. -Let me know in the comments.

With much love and gratitude,

Gretchen

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Overwhelmed By Budgeting? 3 Ways to Feel at Ease With It

Overwhelmed By Budgeting? 3 Ways to Feel at Ease With It Have you ever felt totally scattered when it came time to do your bills?

Maybe you’ve felt panicked that your card might be declined because you didn’t know for sure if you had enough money to cover a purchase.

If your money’s a mess, it translates into stress for you and your family, and can make you feel worried about every last penny you spend.

Since I don’t want you to be unnecessarily penny-pinching, I was wondering if you you’d like to know how I keep my monthly costs straight? I’ve got three tools that make it easier to get all my monthly bills paid and to know if I can afford a new StitchFix.

If you’re curious to see my secret system for monthly budgeting and the three totally free tools that I use to save time and tons of hassle, read on. I’m even sharing a bonus tool that you can use right away to get your bank balance and bills under control.

I wouldn’t consider myself a numbers guru, however, I’ve created a system that works well for my household and allows for me to be on top of my numbers all the time. My process is deceivingly simple for the amount of stress that it alleviates and it’s something you can use, too.

I start with a spreadsheet. You can use Excel or Google Sheets but know that you don’t have to pay a monthly subscription for accounting software to figure out your budget.

Sample BudgetTo understand the system I’m using, I’m giving you this free budgeting spreadsheet as an extra bonus. Click through to download it now (no email required). It’ll make the system I’m about to share with you understandable.

Now that you’ve downloaded the Monthly Budget Spreadsheet, take a look at the tracking categories:

  1. Columns on the left show what I pay monthly, the amount due and date due.
    1. I list them based on the due dates from the beginning to the end of the month.
  2. If there are promotions (say for credit cards) I’ll note their expiration date.
  3. On the right said I break the month down into weeks. This way I know what’s coming in and what’s going out and the timing of it all.
  4. I make sure my monthly total matches my weekly total breakdown.

Tool 1: Calendar Reminders

So I don’t incur extra fees or miss payments, I add all of my payments to my Google calendar so I know when they’re due and the amount that needs to be paid. If they come out automatically, I always list those the Friday before the week it’s due so I’m sure not to miss a payment.

Tool 2: Spreadsheet Calculating the Numbers

I’m harnessing that neat-o ability my spreadsheet has to automatically calculate my numbers so I’m tracking them and making sure I’m adding correctly. Having the spreadsheet automatically calculate and total numbers avoids mis-calculations that easily can happen when you add by hand. And, with it all in ONE place on my spreadsheet, it acts like a “dashboard” so I can jump in and see things at-a-glance.

Tool 3: Regular Check In

I add a recurring reminder to my calendar to check in and to look at the numbers once a week. This means I never feel overwhelmed and I’m never too far behind. It helps me to feel more in control of my finances and like an organized super woman.

In fact, the spreadsheet is designed so I’m always ahead of things. This allows me to move from being reactive if a surprise bill happens (you say I have to fix what on my car?!?) to being proactive.

This system makes me FEEL better about my finances, it helps me to know what I can spend and where. It’s great to be able to help others when the need is there. And, if a mega sale on something comes up (flight to Puerto Rico??), I know right away if I can take advantage of it.

Knowing and understanding the number of clients or amount of monthly income I need to bring in to contribute to our monthly bills brings me peace of mind for sure. The system makes it easier to do my accounting as the automation of tasks saves time and keeps me on top of things with a very manageable process.

As one who loves knowing and understanding numbers, I believe that a budget is the best tool for removing a big layer of stress and fear so you can have more time to do the things you really enjoy.

You’re now equipped with three tools and a bonus tracking spreadsheet to help get control over your budget once and for all. Leave a note in the comments if you’ve got questions about the tools or system. Or let me know what helps to make your budgeting process easier.

With much gratitude,

Gretchen

 

 

P.S. Are you feeling nuts over your numbers because you don’t know what’s coming in and when money-wise? Do you feel like your money worries go beyond what my budgeting system can fully fix? Got questions about my budgeting system? This is the kind of thing I help people like you work through. I welcome you to schedule a free 20 minute call to talk about it.

 

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