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Master of Procrastination – Is That You?

I’d love to know. Is it ever a struggle for you to remain focused?

Does your mind tend to wander all over the place when you really need to get things done?

If you’re anything like me, this tends to be true when you’re working towards a deadline or have a big project to start.

I like to say that I’m the master of procrastination when it comes to these things. I’ll distract myself as much as I can until it’s time to take action or the due date is lurking.

But, the one thing that’s proven itself time and time again is that once I start to take action, I always surprise myself at how bad it really wasn’t. All that worrying, delaying, resisting and losing focus on what I wanted to make happen, for nothing! You’d think I would have learned by now, however, it still happens! I’m human.

The greatest lesson here is don’t beat yourself up over patterns or behaviors that keep surfacing.

As long as you are aware of them and can take corrective action to get back on track, that’s all that matters! You will still be able to achieve your goals or get that big project done.

This quote by LL Cool J says it best! “Stay focused, go after your dreams and keep moving toward your goals.”

Warmly,

Filed Under: Blog, General News, Tips & Tools ~ Leave a Comment Tagged With: Focus, Procrastination

Stay On Track + Reach Your BIG Goal

Doing big things can feel totally overwhelming once you start to list out all the things it takes to get that big goal accomplished.

Staying on track can be worse! It’s so easy to get distracted to then only realize you’ve lost precious time and energy because you lost sight of your goal and wound up working on something entirely different. Can you relate?

Before you know it, you realize your focus and motivation on the big goal of yours has gone to mush.

What was originally crystal clear is now like looking at the muddy waters of the Mississippi—you just can’t see through it anymore.

How then do you stay on task and keep your focus? Especially when you’re working on a monumental project with lots of moving parts to it?

I’ve found that getting into the habit of asking yourself one question makes all the difference.

In theatre actors use a similar line of questioning by using the “magic if” to ask themselves questions about the character they’re playing. It helps them conjure up better actions and emotions for their character to so they can play the role to its fullest.

In life and business building, you can use a similar “questioning” idea to stay on track and accomplish your goals by asking a different yet still magical phrase…

“What’s the next step for my biggest goal?”

When you ask yourself this one question, you all of a sudden prioritize what you need to do next. It’s clear again.

You don’t need to worry about what step comes after that. It’s a method to stay on your game and not get side tracked.

If your answer to the question does not relate to what you’re actually doing today, it makes it clear that you’ve got to adjust your plan and get back to that “next step” whatever it is.

For example, if the next big thing you’re working toward is to start your own Virtual Assistant business, you likely will have researched a business name, chosen the business entity that best fits your needs along with a whole host of other actions to get your business off the ground. Nice work! And maybe you’ve finally got a few leads that are looking promising.

Maybe you feel a little worried because you don’t know what to do next. This is a great time to stop and ask yourself, “What’s the next step for my biggest goal?”

Sometimes it takes a little thinking to get what this next action step really needs to be and you can usually get that answer in a few minutes.

In this example, if your answer is to learn how to price my services and what to include in a package so potential clients will hire me—awesome! You’ve got your next step.

This then becomes your action plan for the day.

If this next step wasn’t already on your schedule for the day, you need to change direction so your actions are linked to supporting the next most important thing for you to do to reach your goal.

Just like that, you’ve re-framed your actions to match and support your next big goal.

Now give it a go and see how this idea works for you. Ask yourself this question right now. “What’s the next step for my biggest goal?”

Leave me a comment and let me know if it changed or adjusted what you planned to do for the next day or week. I’d love to hear if it’s helpful to think of things this way.

With much love and gratitude,

P.S. If you happen to be a virtual assistant who is looking to up her business game to get and keep more of your perfect clients, I made something just for you. Check it out here.

Filed Under: Blog, General News, Tips & Tools ~ Leave a Comment Tagged With: Business Building, Focus

Am I Resting or Just Being Lazy?

For many highly motivated people it can be tough to take a rest. They feel like they shouldn’t be relaxing for so many reasons and sometimes it just feels wrong to take a break. In fact, it can feel like resting is being outright lazy.

Truthfully though, resting and being lazy are two very different things that easily get thrown together by our minds.

How do you tell the difference between when you need rest or if you’re just being lazy? The two seem so much alike that this can be a tough distinction, especially for driven people.

In my opinion, lazy is when you go along for the ride, letting whatever happens happen. You’re not directing it.

You happen to plop down, exhausted from your long day and turn on the TV. You watch whatever bad TV is available to numb your mind and take the day away. It’s the equivalent of eating a bag of Cheetos. It’s junk food for your soul and it’s an example of being lazy.

You know that you could be watching a better show or doing something that is more meaningful that’s actually restorative but you pick the easy route and watch whatever B movie happens to be on the tube. It’s just like opening the bag of Cheetos is easier than making a snack with more protein, fiber or vitamins would be better for you.

The problem with lazy.

So you might be thinking, “So what? being lazy ever so often is okay by me.” And, I’d agree with you, however, there are a few reasons why being “lazy” doesn’t get you what you need.

You don’t really feel rested or recharged. Whatever activity you just did was out of habit or convenience instead of thoughtful and something that you know would give you more energy.

Laziness doesn’t give you energy. It supports feeling apathetic, indifferent about life and lacking enthusiasm for the things you thought you loved.

True rest is restorative. Sleep isn’t the only way to achieve it.

You pick what you want to do that you know will feel fulfilling and it recharges your batteries and then you go do it.

This means that rest isn’t always about sitting and not “doing”. In fact, doing can be a great way to fill your bucket with energy. What activities do you really like doing?

If you think rest will just happen, know that it won’t. You have to take the bull by the horns and work it in. With so much constantly going on in life, and frankly coming at you, restorative things don’t just happen by chance as much as we’d like to think they do.

It’s rare that real rest, the kind that recharges your mind, body and soul, happens by chance. Running into a friend can tap into this restorative process, but it doesn’t happen often enough.

Don’t be lazy about rest, plan for it.

Restful activities that are specifically chosen to help you feel better, do just that. You know yourself best so what works for you?

For example, if you’re going to be upset at yourself because you’ve been sooo unproductive over the weekend, you know that being “lazy” and doing whatever is easy doesn’t support what you need to feel good.

Now you know how to tell when you’re just being lazy or if you’re actually getting the recharge and rest that you need to feel fulfilled and ready for the world on all fronts—emotionally, physically and mentally.

Where in your schedule can you be more selective about doing truly restful activities? Let me know in the comments.

With much love and gratitude,

Filed Under: Blog, General News, Tips & Tools ~ Leave a Comment Tagged With: stress

Relax, Refresh, Recharge.

Recently I’ve really been trying to rest + rejuvenate and encourage you to do the same. For me though, that’s hard. SO HARD! Can you relate?

I am one of those people whose mind tries to say it’s not okay to rest until all the things are done (is that even a reality?!). While I know that’s not true, it’s a real struggle I have within myself.

But this month, that’s been different. Since I’m truly conscious of what I’m trying to achieve and reminding myself on the daily, it’s happening!!!

I’m resting more, relaxing more, enjoying life more and finding the joy within on so many different levels. I’m not saying every day is perfect, but it is much better!

How has this month been treating you? Are you experiencing a month similar to mine or perhaps one of the opposite? I would love to know!

If I could share more with you on this topic, what would you love to know? Please share. 🙂

This phrase (or maybe it’s more of a mantra?) really resonated and so I wanted to share it with you. Maybe it will help in your efforts to stay focused and rejuvenated: Relax, Refresh, Recharge.

With much love and gratitude,

Filed Under: Blog, General News ~ Leave a Comment Tagged With: stressbuster

Does Rest Make You Feel Guilty?

Whenever you think about letting yourself take a cat nap, sit and read a book or go for a walk; does the thought ever cross your mind that “Maybe you shouldn’t”?

Does meeting a friend for coffee or lunch feel a little like you’re getting away with murder or taking too much time away from the “other things” you think you should be doing?

If any of this sounds familiar, I’m willing to bet that you fall into the category of being a highly motivated person who is used to getting things D-O-N-E (yes, in all caps!).

You’re not conditioned to take a break.

Maybe you’re afraid of the chaos that will happen if you do take a break by doing something fun or rejuvenating that’s not on your to-do list.

Maybe you don’t know what rest looks like anymore.

When you’ve been working hard and making sure you’re meeting all of your obligations, sometimes you start to feel worn out, right? Not only have you been doing, doing and doing but you’ve also been using up your well of emotional energy, too, which is even more taxing.

When it’s no longer fun to check-off all those things on your to-do list, it’s time to take a rest.

It’s important to note that resting is not stopping or quitting. It’s about, giving yourself a break. It’s about planning your days in a way where you aren’t asking yourself to be SO productive ALL the time.

It’s also about adding things into your day that will make the journey more fun and filled with joy.

What’s at stake?

If you don’t work in periods of rest into your schedule, so many things can happen. Anxiety, stress, mistakes, lack of clients, lack of productivity, and a lack of fun, passion and excitement to name a few.

But it’s so difficult to relax!

Okay, I hear you. Maybe you don’t have time to relax? Maybe you feel guilty for it because you know that you’ll not be able to do the trillion things you said you would? Maybe you don’t know how to work it in? I totally get YOU!

What to do?

The solution to not feeling guilty about relaxing is to plan for it. Add something relaxing to your schedule every day, every week or as much as you need it to support your not feeling overwhelmed.

If you add it to your calendar, you can look forward to it and not have that feeling like “I really shouldn’t be doing this totally relaxing thing.”

Planning for it helps you to set the expectation that doing restful and rejuvenating things are an acceptable and mandatory part of your process. Incorporating re-charging blocks of time into your schedule means that you won’t get so close to burnout and feeling overwhelmed all the time.

It sets the model for your significant other, children, co-workers and friends that in order to be the loving, awesome person you normally are, you need breaks at certain intervals and that they’re healthy to take.

What do you think? Have you planned something that could be considered restful into your day before? If not, what’s a break that you could add to your schedule this week? Let me know in the comments.

With much love and gratitude,

Filed Under: Blog, General News, Tips & Tools ~ Leave a Comment Tagged With: Rest

If you’re feeling worn out… I feel YOU!

After a few long weeks of family gatherings, doing big things in business, traveling, having nearly everyone in my family get sick in both big and small ways, having my car break down, working on a non-profit event and ending a long-standing work relationship, I was feeling totally worn out!

Even though a lot of that list includes things that are positive and were intentions I set out to create, I started to doubt my skills and my abilities.

Luckily, I noticed that I was feeling yucky because I was exhausted, not because my skills had mysteriously taken a nosedive. ALL of the things I experienced were very energetically tiring.

When I came across this quote by the street artist, Bansky, I had to share it with you as a reminder not doubt yourself just because you’re feeling worn out. Instead, give yourself a break and do what you need to do to start to feel like you have energy again.

“If you get tired, learn to rest, not quit.” -Bansky

It might be that you force yourself to sit and read for an hour instead of folding laundry or answering emails. Whatever it is, give rest a try and see if that solves those yucky, I’m-so-exhausted feelings after you’ve been super busy.

I hope you have a safe, fun and relaxing week!

With much love and gratitude,

Filed Under: Blog, General News, Tips & Tools ~ Leave a Comment Tagged With: Rest

Always planning for Worse Case Scenario?

Does life feel like it’s humming along just fine, however, you still feel worried about what’s to come?

Even if life is stable—you’ve got a great job, your kids are doing well, you’re healthy—feeling uncertain about all the things that are most important to you can still happen.

It’s easy to feel like you’re always waiting for the next unforeseen “thing” to occur. This can make you go into total “worse case scenario” mode. Have you been there?

Worse case scenario mode is when you try to plan for every possible outcome, most of which are bad, that race through your mind. This is so you feel prepared for anything that might come your way.

In the process of preparing for what can feel like a battle all the time, the joy of the day or month can easily evaporate. The thoughts racing through your mind take you away from being in the present moment. It can keep you in this worry zone, making you feel like you can’t come up for air.

When you notice this starting to happen, what can you do?

Dig In

Take a look at what you want. Not what someone else wants but what YOU want. As if no one else were a part of your world, what would you want to do, to have, to feel?

What makes you glow?
Who do you love to spend time with?
What makes you happy?
What makes you laugh?
What makes you feel strong?
What makes you feel proud?
What makes you feel loved?

Did the answer to those come to you right away or did it send you into a little bit of a panic?

Constant worrying creates a whirl of urgent activity and it leaves little room for considering what matters most to you.

Skip It?

Does it feel easier to keep reading instead of stopping to answer those questions? If it does, I urge you to stop and go back to answer those questions as much as you can right now.

Yep, head back up to that list and jot down the first thing that comes to mind for each. Even if it feels imperfect, keep going. You know what they say, first thought is the best thought. Don’t overthink it. 🙂

Way to Go!

Now that you’ve come up with some answers for those questions, you know more about what YOU want out of life. This is what you emotionally want to feel like and what you physically want out of life. It’s like your life wish list.

Knowing what you (yes specific to just you!) want in life helps to cut your to-do list in half because you will have likely knocked off half of the things, or at the very least, have moved them from the “need” category to the “nice to have” category on your list.

Knowing what you want means that you’ll feel less anxious, panicked and worried about life.

You’ll feel more confident, more capable, and like you are up to the challenge of taking on the world.

What’s something in your answers that surprised you most? What’s one that really excited you? And most importantly, what are a few things you can put in place to get those things?

Here’s to you making that life wish list happen! Everything is possible if you believe in yourself!

With much love and gratitude,

Filed Under: Blog, General News, Tips & Tools ~ Leave a Comment Tagged With: Change, Motivation, Transformation

Don’t Give Up Trying

As I continue to transition my focus in business (and in life for that matter!), I find that there are always roadblocks and hurdles to overcome.

At times, I consider throwing in the towel.

I think, who am I to be doing this?

Am I really cut out for this work?

Am I following the right path that I’m meant to be following? Please show me the signs like yesterday!

All of these thoughts are major energy drains when I allow myself to go there. I can easily fall into self doubt and negative self talk.

However, only when I’m really feeling those feels and having those thoughts do I reflect and remember that if I don’t continue to try to achieve my goals, they’re never going to become my reality. I quickly turn those negative thoughts into positive ones.

My greatest work during this time of transition is to remember why I’m doing it and to make sure I’m doing only the work that I love. Can you relate?

So I find this quote to be quite fitting when I start to feel this way.

“Just don’t give up trying to do what you really want to do. Where there is love and inspiration, I don’t think you can go wrong.” – Ella Fitzgerald

Warmly,

Filed Under: Blog, General News ~ Leave a Comment Tagged With: Change, Motivation

If you don’t ask…

I think it’s true that we all experience in some way, shape or form a little hesitation at times when it comes to asking for what we need or want. At least I know that to be true for me.

It feels like too big of an ask or risk, and there’s always the looming fear of being rejected.

One thing, that I always find to be true and remind myself of often, is that if I don’t move forward with what it is that I want, I’ll never get it. Or the answer will always be no!

So if you find yourself wanting to launch that offer, ask for a raise, hire that coach, or even build a new house (yes, I went there…we shall see;)), please do it!

You deserve it and owe it to yourself.

The worst case scenario is that those things won’t become a reality and the truth is, had you never asked it wouldn’t have happened anyways. I invite you to not hold back and take the chance.

I found this quote to be quite fitting, “If you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never have it. If you don’t ask, the answer is always no. If you don’t step forward, you’re always in the same place.” ~ Nora Roberts

I wish for you to ask for all that you need and desire in life. So, let me know in the comments, what will you ask for?

Filed Under: Blog, General News ~ Leave a Comment Tagged With: Abundance, Expectations, Transformation

Trust is the glue of life….

“Trust is the glue of life. It’s the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It’s the foundational principle that holds all relationships.” -Stephen Covey

This quote resonates for me because boundaries are part of that trust.

People know what you are willing to do and what you aren’t so they can trust you. They can trust how you’ll act, how you’ll show up, and how you’ll support them or not.

Trust is a required element for setting and keeping boundaries.

You have to tow your own line and expect that others will tow the line of keeping their boundaries. Otherwise, you’ll never know if you’re crossing them.

You’re not a mind reader, right? So this makes sense. You’re trusting that others will tell you when you cross the line or are about to so you can have a good relationship.

As you must do the same for them. It’s a mutual trust.

When have you let someone know that they overstepped one of your boundaries? How did you feel after doing so and how did they respond?

I’d love to hear about it in the comments.

With much love and gratitude,

Filed Under: Blog, General News ~ Leave a Comment Tagged With: Boundries, Business Building, Trust

What’s at stake?

But it’s so difficult to relax!

What to do?

Dig In

Skip It?

Way to Go!

Feeling Overwhelmed? 3 Key Triggers – Which Are Yours?