Do you ever feel like you’re not being heard? Like the person on the other side of your conversation isn’t listening?
How frustrating! When this happens it just feels like you’re wasting your time, right?
How then, do you ensure that when you’re speaking with clients, friends or family members that you’re helping them to feel heard in the same ways you want to be heard?
This is called active listening and it means that you focus on what the other person is saying, you’re thinking about the meaning of their words, and you respond in a positive, helpful manner that confirms you actually heard what the person was saying.
Conversations like these can feel magical. They can validate what someone is saying in a way that goes to the core of that person’s being. And, it can avoid a ton of miscommunication.
If you want to be a better listener, and hence a better communicator, check out these suggestions. They’re some of my best tips to help you fully connect with your customers, friends and family in meaningful ways.
Remove Distractions
Set the cell phone upside down, away from you and on silent mode so you’re not tempted to sneak a peek as to what’s going on in the digital world.
Let THEM Talk
This means you don’t interrupt. If you get a brilliant idea that you’re dying to share, wait for the right pause in conversation to share it. Or, make a note and share it later when your speaker is done talking.
Repeat
When in a conversation with someone, repeat back what they’ve said to confirm you understand. For example, “I heard you say that you felt overwhelmed by all of the things you need to do in the next month. Is that right?”
Ask Questions
This helps you to learn more and have a deeper understanding of what your companion is talking about. Ask relevant and specific questions. Give them some thought.
Take Notes
If you’re meeting in person, let them know that you take notes as a way to better absorb the conversation. If you’re engaged in taking notes, that means you’re listening to what they have to say. This works especially great for client conversations and if you’re a fast writer or typist.
Active listening takes practice.
So, if you’re a talker and find yourself interrupting others, make it a point to practice polite interjections in conversation instead of talking over others. If you tend to space-out and day dream during conversations, see if taking notes and asking questions can help you keep your focus.
I invite you to use these five tips to see if you can become a better communicator by becoming a better listener. Which tips do you want to try?
With much love and gratitude,
Speak Your Mind