Do others see you differently than you see yourself?
Do they think you’re smart, organized, or successful? Are you likeable?
Or maybe they think you’re lazy, over confident or a complainer?
We’ve all got stories in our minds of how *we think* other people or the “everybody’s” perceive us. But in reality, those stories are a giant blind spot and we aren’t all that sure how we’re viewed.
Since we’re all inside our own minds and bodies, it’s hard to get a full, 360 degree view of ourselves. Sometimes this blind spot presents itself as a mysterious disconnect. “Why did they act that way towards me?? Or “How come I didn’t get that job?”
Sometimes the blind spot results in lack of trust in yourself or is the basis for patterns in your life that you hate to see pop up again and again.
What if you could know how others see you?
Body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice all play a part. They tell people right away how much they can trust us and how authentic we are.
Sometimes we carry ourselves and express ourselves in ways that we don’t even realize. From simple things such as how a person might not stand up straight all the time or how someone else might, out of habit, always ask questions that they already have the answer to. Both of these are things those people don’t know they’re doing and if they knew how it was shaping the way others see them and their potential, they might decide to adjust how they show up in that area.
So the question is, how do you figure this out? Do you survey your family and friends? Your co-workers (gah!)? Maybe take an online personality test but can you really trust that?
There’s an easier way and if you’ve been following my work for a while, you’ll be able to guess that yes, it involves horses.
Stepping into a round pen with a horse is one of the fastest ways to learn what’s hidden in your personal blindspot. It’s far better than surveying your friends or taking an online quiz because a horse never judges you and more importantly, it never lies. The horse will always mirror back to you how you are feeling internally while all being done nonverbally.
Most every time a client is in the round pen experiencing the Equus coaching process, they have an ‘ah-ha!’ moment.
This experience, without ever getting on a horse, amps up their confidence because of what they’ve learned from those ah-ha moments. These discoveries put those disquieting, I-know-things-could-be-better worries at bay.
They finally give them a glimpse into how others see and react to them every day. They’re able to understand patterns and behaviors that aren’t serving their needs. And, they’re able to take action to change them immediately.
One example is if a person has issues with boundaries. This helps them put themselves first, and finally create a life that they want instead of playing small, only pleasing others and never reaching their full potential.
It means having solid confidence, feeling empowered and taking charge of life.
Through the horse’s’ ability to validate actions, blind spots are reflected back to help each person see a better path to reaching their goals. Being able to see how others perceive them means they can change unhelpful habits to create and enjoy the life they’ve always wanted.
Have you ever worried how other people see you and how it might be shaping your life? Or do you feel like you have habits that are hard to put your finger on that are getting in your way? Let me know in the comments. I’d love to hear how this shows up for you.
With much love and gratitude,
Speak Your Mind